6-6-2026
I am pleased to announce that I am now officially seeking a romantic partner or partner system.

This comes on the heels of a realization that my life is seemingly perfect right now, but romance with an external non-fictional person is seemingly the only thing I lack, and the only thing contributing to my depression at present.

I personally feel that I am emotionally stable enough to begin a romantic relationship at present, because I've been managing Discord servers and meeting new people in a platonic context for the past month or so, and that's gone basically completely fine, so I think I should be able to handle romantic interactions.

Romantic relationships with me are complicated in some respects, because I don't necessarily see the same things as romantic that other people do. I am aroace-spec, and to me, romance is about being close with someone you're attracted to, not about sex or about calling someone pet names or about making them your main priority in life.

That means that, to me, things that are romantic include having long and meaningful conversations, hearing someone share about their day or about something they're doing, and sending people gifts in the mail. To a lot of people, these things are a part of friendship and you don't need romance to have them, but this is how I act towards someone when I love them romantically.

Ideally, I'm doing all those things with someone I'm aesthetically attracted to, as, for me, romance is basically physical attraction plus emotional attraction, and the only kind of physical attraction I have to people is aesthetic. I'm mostly aesthetically attracted to men older than myself and to goth/alt people, and I'm not sure how many people like that I'll necessarily find through running a partner (system) search server on Discord, which is what I'm doing, although I do consider how headmates look in systems to count for how attracted to them I am.

The alternative is that it's someone I'm really strongly emotionally attracted to, to the point where I just liked them enough that it felt romantic. Normally, you need to be someone who has a lot of interests in common with me or someone who genuinely understands me on a deep level, and I haven't really found that for a while, in just about anybody. But you can also get there just by being really, really nice and showing that you care about me as a person, and I'm sure there's got to be a few genuinely nice people out there.

As mentioned before, I made a Discord server to look for a partner or partner system - I'm not really particular if they're a system or not so long as they see themselves as dating my system as a collective while also engaging with us individually. The website for the server is here, which has information about the rules and policies before you join, as well as information about me as a person so you know who you're signing up to date.

If I don't form any kind of romantic or romantic-adjacent feelings for anyone I meet through this server at all, I'm happy to make friends or even get another QPP out of this. The hope, though, is to get some kind of romantic partner who I'm attracted to and who is attracted to me.